Ask Mike: The birds and the bees
Hey Guys,
Few words inspire quite as much fear in the hearts of parents as “the birds and the bees.” In honor of all those who’ve either had to give or sit through “the talk,” I vowed to figure out how the expression got started.
I made my first stop at Phrases.org, a great site that specializes in nailing down the origin of words and expressions. ‘Phrases’ cites several possible explanations. One possibility–Cole Porter. The legendary songwriter’s lyrics to “Let’s Do It” contains the following line: “And that’s why birds do it, bees do it, Even educated fleas do it, Let’s do it, let’s fall in love.”
Interesting, but Phrases wasn’t convinced that Mr. Porter is responsible for “birds and the bees” becoming synonymous with sex education. I went to another great source, World Wide Words to see what they had to say. They also mention Cole Porter, but note that the first “explicit use of the phrase” came in a 1939 issue of the Freeport Journal Standard. The paper wrote: “A Frenchman was born sophisticated: he knows about the birds and the bees. In consequence, French films are made on a basis of artistic understanding that does not hamper the story.”
I decided to check one more source–the always reliable Straight Dope. Straight Dope cites the poet Samuel Coleridge. Quoteth Mr. Coleridge in 1825: “All nature seems at work … The bees are stirring–birds are on the wing … and I the while, the sole unbusy thing, not honey make, nor pair, nor build, nor sing.”
So, opinions seem split. Some folks credit a poet, others a songwriter, and still others a random quote in a newspaper. That’s often the case with cliches–we all say ‘em, but nobody knows who’s responsible.
Wondering how other words or phrases were coined? Leave a comment below and let’s help each other out.
Thanks for reading,
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I’ve always gotten the bees part because they pollinate…but I’ve yet to get what the birds have to do with it…
That is a album by the Christian Rock band Relient K (came out this year: 2008)
interesting. a phrase with a lost beginning.
I think its older than Cole Porter or 1939 either one.
I want to know where the saying “through thick and thin came from” and whether thick or thin refers to the bad happenings.
“birds and bees” ancient proverbs
frantic finch frivolously feast fermented fruits,
flying finch falls frolicking fro for feathered fancy,
slim pickin’s and sting like the dickens,
nest-stings
~little lady robin red breast, came pluckin’ at my hair,
ouch, ouch! said I, whats ya doing up there,
to fine and dandy crop of brush, she soared,
just a few more nestle tidbits for her nestling’s way up there,
~ off to the garden, down deep these seedlings sowed,
ouch, ouch!, said I, what deeply be bestowed,
a sting of little bumbles has me stumble from my knees,
while springs a bloom with fragrant apple trees,
best I rest in my humble abode,
best I rest indeed,
..
I thought it was called the birds and the bees because its the birds and the bees that carry the pollen from one flower to another so that they pollinate and help them reprouduce.
thats quite cool!
but wouldn’t the bird get stung halfway through?
Its nice to hear that other people think the same way I to have pondered many of these phrases like the theme song to Lavern and shirly when the start off they say ‘ shalmio shlmazo” what the heck is that ? I found out many years later that a shalimio was someone who did stupid things and a shlmzo was someone who had stupid things done to them. where the names came from polish, Itilan not sure but I found out what they were singin about.
Very interesting,what will generations from now think of the language and word choice we currently use.
♥
Appreciated the time you took to research this phrase,my son knows stuff at 16 ,lol ,i was still playing with dolls,knew nothing about birds and bees.
I have learned to be unshockable,things aren’t as taboo as they were when i was his age.I just want him to respect the opposite sex,and hope his “journey” makes him happy
“How is babby formed?”
I’ve had cause to look at the origin of a lot of famous phrases. What I very often find is that the phrase was coined by one person but popularized later by a different person, who is then widely attributed for the phrase. For instance, the phrase “Triple Crown” that references a series of three thoroughbred horse races is widely credited to Daily Racing Form Columnist Charles Hatton in the 1930s, but it was used in articles in the NY Times in the 1920s.
What about “rule of thumb”? I’ve heard it’s because of how it used to be used for measuring, like up to the first knuckle is about an inch. But i’ve also heard it used to be a law that a man couldn’t hit his wife with anything bigger than the width of his thumb. So what’s the story on this one? what is a “good rule of thumb”??
It’s pretty obvious, in context, that the phrase had already been coined by the time the newspaper had used it. Sounds to me like Coleridge laid the foundation, Cole Porter changed the grammar, then common usage turned it into the exact cliche we hear today.
Hmm, interesting… I never thought about where that phrase came from before now.
hey i think thats its called the birds and bees cause the bees are the girls and the birds are the guys. if the bird goes to quickly at the bee it will sting. the birds fly around and want to be with the bees.
wait and then so the birds have to get the bee comfortable and be nice. u know? kinda like girls and guys. saw it on lincon hights.
Mike,
That is a good one continue in that spirit.
How do make a cartoon face like you?
where do babies come from
That phrase started back in the Victorian era, when parents explained that stuff to their children (the night before the wedding). They used the metaphor of birds and bees pollinating flowers.
Oh, I always assumed it had something to do with pollination.
Cool
It’s really freaking obvious that the term developed because birds and bees carried pollen from one flower to another, which is how flowers mate.
The term was probably used when children were around, and developed to a wider audience, until everyone knew what it meant.
It’s weird because the birds tend to eat the pollen.
i always thought it was because bees pollinated (they represent guys) and birds took care of the eggs (representing girls)
Well I always understood that the bee was the man ’cause he pollinates, and the bird is the woman ’cause she has eggs. I just never understood what they had to do with each other in that sense.
I think the phrase developed when the equal rights amemdment made it legal for birds and bees to get married.
I always thought it was because bees had pollen “sperm”. And birds laid eggs…”eggs”.
See…I always thought birds lay eggs (females have eggs) and bees have stingers (males have penises).
Babies come from moms. Where the mom is from, i don’t know. What nationality will the baby be is decided by what nation his/her mom has him/her in.
I always figured that the ‘birds’ part was because females are often referred to as birds, or these days, chicks. and the whole bee pollination thing, well, it’s easy to guess that link to guys isn’t it…
hey Mike. I always enjoy your blog. I was just wondering one thing. Is the Yamster a girl? You know that will take all the fun out of Yamster bashing? Keep this top secret. keep her under covers.
Come on and hit me back Mike. I can take a joke and smile. I will be quiet until I g
You do a really good job,
just Mike
wtf happened to my msg.?
Where did the phrase piggyback ride come from?
The birds represent the egg, the bees represent the sperm, BeeVee
Help, I accidently a bird bee
What do I do?
In dutch, the expression goes, translated: about the flowers and bees.
They pollinate the flowers; a form of sexual intercourse amongst plants.
That’s a bit more logical.
I always thought that birds & bees come out during spring, and spring is the “mating season”. but the pollination makes sense too…
I always thought it was an old science video, and parents just used a ‘school assignment’ as a chance to really talk to their kids. That’s how I learned, though we don’t watch the video today…blech
I don’t think I agree with the whole “it’s because they both pollinate” thing. What exactly do birds have to do with pollination? Maybe I’m just being dumb and they actually do, but I didn’t think so…
The following phrase seems to be the most overused currently: “…weighed in” or “weighing in” when someone gives their opinion. What is the origin of this phrase. Thanks
@keeblerman101
The Relient K EP album is “The birds and the bee sides”. Mostly it is a play on words, actually referring to the “B side” of a 45 record (vinyl) that was rarely listened to. This is made obvious because The birds and the bee sides album is mostly full of unreleased recordings that were cut from other albums or were acoustic versions.
Also one of the songs addresses how “no one knows what vinyl is” and how kids these days have no clue what a B side is.
One of my favorite lines from that is “it’s my cd player’s fault / lets go to the park and play some Frisbee golf”
haha cheers.
I always thought it was because birds and bees are the two biggest pollinators of flowers etc. and aid in the reproduction of plants. Thus…you get the idea.
Well, ‘The birds and the bees’ is just an idiom, saying that most of ‘creatures in nature does it’, and the ‘it’ means, basically ‘sex’ and ‘courtship’, basically a censored term for ‘young children’ to understand that it happens, but at the same time, not taking them into thinking ‘they should do it at young age’, because it’s meant to be ‘rude’ if a child says a ‘sex’ in public, at least ‘The birds and the bees’ can mean plenty of things, but its just not ‘censorial’, its just a reference to children, as normally ‘nature is studied’ from young age, and they should understand it is natural, not gross, if they thought it was gross, well we wouldn’t be here now, would we?
The phrase goes back “Before’ Christ times’, and has existed in many languages, it’s hard to track.
And well, because ‘The birds and the bees’ ‘do’ ‘do it’, and thus, we can use it as a ‘basic example’.
I hope this helps.
CybX.
“The birds and the bees” (sometimes expanded to “the birds, the bees and the butterflies” or “the birds, the bees, the flowers, and the trees”) is an idiomatic expression which refers to courtship and sex, and is usually used in reference to teaching someone, often a young child, about sex and pregnancy. The phrase is evocative of the metaphors and euphemisms often used to avoid speaking openly and technically about the subject.
Another use of this phrase comes from the work of John Burroughs, a naturalist who lived and worked in the Catskills Mountains. He wrote a small pamphlet called “Birds and Bees: Essays”[5] in which he explained the workings of nature in a way that children could understand. However, birds and bees are dealt with in separate sections; nowhere are they mentioned together.
how would a bird pollinate the flower though???
as a the father of a girl i once dated put it:
him:”before i let you go off with my daughter, i need to have a little talk with you about the birds and the bees”
me:”thanks, but my parents have already given me that talk”
him:”not this way they haven’t, you see, when the bee stings the bird, the bee dies”
me:*stares dumbly for a moment*
him:”you 2 have fun now. and have her back by 11, bee.”
probably not the real reason, but it’s definitely the explanation i’m gonna give my kids.
Shlemiel and Shlemazel are actually Yiddish (related to Polish, but not quite). A rather quaint description says that the Shlemazel is the waiter who spills soup on the customer. The Shlemiel is the poor guy who gets spilled upon.
(not about the birds and the bees, but wanted to clarify for the person who wondered about the Laverne and Shirley song)
Adults do not want to contaminate the minds of kids or else that would be called sexual abuse of another kind. So they come up with something which is unavoidable to the eyes of the kids so that they will know it is something like that. And when they grow more matured and are ready to know the reality, then they will know exactly what will happen on their marriage night.
I conjecture that it has to do with the way they differ in their ‘rites of spring’. The bees do it all inside a beehive, in confinement, and the birds do it out in the open for all to see (they’re not embarrassed and have no laws) and are free. One’s institutionalized and one isn’t.
It’s so ironic how many of the comments are as innocent and child-like as the origination of the topic.
That song sounda like the opening for The Secret Life Of The American Teenager- the summer hit TV show about a pregnant teen girl that was on ABC Family. Amongst some of the lamest phrases for having sex we would always say “do it” or “doing it” when we were talking about sex in the media when I was in 3rd grade.
My friend was the one who gave me most of my birds and bees talks- talking about how she would be real quiet and stay awake in her room so her parents would think she was asleep and she would listen to her parents noises unaware there daughter was awake. She also watched a few R rated movies where I rarely ever did.( I stayed up once to catch the tooth fairy off guard and I was shocked to find out it was my parents!)
I thought a tampon went up a womans urethra though (I hardly knew it by scientific terms) I thought girls had 2 holes, and that when we bled it was from where we urinated too,so it seemed completely insane to me that we should need to use pads or tampons since urine just didn’t come pouring out of you all the time, and this was after we watched this really old video about getting our periods, that had Orphan Annie all grown up in it. So afterwards I told my friend I didn’t get why girls used that stuff and she explained the vagina was another hole, I couldn’t believe we had 3 so when I got home I took a mirror and actually looked downstairs in total disbelief I found another hole I didn’t know I had!
She also explained virginity to me in like the 5th grade, and that “sleeping with someone” wasn’t always the literal translation, I thought that a man and woman would sleep in a bed together and that was sex and she could get pregnant, she also explained to me the penis was not just for a man to pee but his sex organ, like we had a vagina, men specifically had there penis, and I was a freshman in high school when I found out why my friends dog appeared to have 2 sex organs, and that the other stuff was not just an ornamental body part like male nipples!
I think it is important that schools educate early and thourghly, especially about puberty and such because some kids parents don’t explain or kids don’t want there parents telling them,and I think schools should explain to both boys and girls what happens to both sexes at least a short, to-the-point honest explanation, because girls are curious about what happens in guys and vice versa, and like most kids will believe almost anything there friends tell them some girl told me that guys had there own version of there period lol so I thought they bled too hahaha. Until I learned differently years later.
I also had a really dumb naieve belief on when women got pregnant, I knew that when the egg was released if it didn’t get fertilzed by sperm a woman would get her period, so I thought that women got pregnant right before there period, so thank god I was way to young to even be interested in actually having sex because if I was sexually active I probably wouldn’t have used condoms, because of the fear of buying them both for the guy and for the girl and because of my false beliefs related to what I thought I understood from the video we watched at school lol!
I look back now and I laugh at it all, but still I consider the seriousness of the need for better sexual education among jr high students, especially when you see a girl who got pregnant at like 12 almost 13 when shes in 6th or 7th grade and is going to give birth.
How about “the calm before the storm?”
I am wondering if they will eventually get rid of the birds and the bees saying since there are some who are trying to redefine marriage and redefine same sex relationships. I am wondering if these groups disagree with the old saying since it deals with nature/natural attachment.
Bees flit from flower to flower like males to females.
Birds nurture and raise their young like females while the males bring home the bacon.
hey, that was an interesting read..
could u please tell me more about the phrase “a stitch in time saves nine” n about “friends n family stick together through thick n thin”..
OK…
the bees pollinate the flowers, we all understand that part, thats really all they do…except make honey, and sting ….
I remember asking my dad when i was really little…like 4/5 how do fish get into ponds? He said whoever builds the pond, usually stocks it with fish. This made no sense to me, “how do they get so many different kinds of fish in one pond, and what about ponds and lakes that are just…there…and nobody builds it….how do the fish get IN …Cranes and other birds that drink, and eat little bugs and fish, get fish eggs on their feet, and they get transferred from pond to pond. Bees are to blossoms as birds are to FISH. Kinda weird but it makes sense, and any time I see a long legged crane, kinda scary looking, really at the edge of the pond, i always think to myself, Wonder if he brought in as many fish as he ate?…and THAT IS MY ANSWER TO THAT..
A STITCH IN TIME SAVES NINE…I think..think, Benjamin Franklin actually said that…but it means the same thing as “IF you aint got time to do it right, when you gonna have time to do it AGAIN?” Fix a situation before it becomes a dilema…
THRU THICK AND THIN,,,means when times are good or when times are bad..THICK means plenty of what they need, food,money ..good times and easy living..THIN, would be opposite, maybe no money, no crops growing, hard winters, sickness…bad times…nothing to eat…you get thinnnner..Doesnt have to be friend, or family…Rule of thumb to use on that one is….SEE WHOSE LEFT when the SMOKE CLEARS…after all is said and done, who stuck it out with you or supported you and vice versa…sometimes you find out families arent friendly to each other, or friends werent what you thought…and sometimes you find out your friends are more like your family, and your family member is really a stranger….AND just so you know…if you ever hear the phrase “BLOOD is thicker than water”….FAMILIES are suppose to always be in your corner…thru fussin and fightin, they still whoop anybody talkin bad or hurting their family.
RULE OF THUMB….you have seen an artist at an easel painting, drawing or sketching a real scene, but the scene is in the distance..he’ll look around his work and hold up his thumb…with his arm straight out in front of him???…He is measuring distance or scale using his thumb to ‘measure’…like a ruler..rule of thumb…RULER/thumb…so that his scale and perspective is correct.accuracy, if thats what he’s going for…Its just a good rule of thumb…means having a standard to go by…no matter what your doing , whatever is relative to the project at hand, whatever standard of measure you use that produces the desired result.would be the “good rule of thumb”….Does that make any sense at all?…I’m an artist…which automatically think to much…., so a good rule of thumb would be to take my advice with a grain of salt. HA, somebody take it from here please…never really understood that one,
but since I brought it upe, a grain of salt would be opposite of what…a grain of sugar, amd seems like you hear the phrase used after someone has SAID or done something that makes you feel bad. People will say O, yknow how so and so is, just take it with a grain of salt…(like that will make you feel better)..Maybe it means, someone needs to season their comments, cold or blunt, or plain truth, ..with a little more sensitivity, …food taste better when it has some kind of seasoning, so if we “add a grain of salt to what the person had said or done,”, it mays it easier to swallow.
o yeah, one more
The calm before a storm,….I live in Mississippi, all my life, I have heard parents, grandparents…talk about how still everything gets right before a tornado hits…Before radar and all the tech we have now, the sky was all you could go by, if the wind and stops blowning and things start getting quiet right in the middle of the rainstorm,,,a tornado is close enough around and the strength of the suction, pulls the rain and every thing around into the tornado…just about the time you see it coming…
People use the phrase kinda loosely tho..”.ITS always quiet before the storm”….always sounds negative to me, like times are just bound to get worse, things are going too good, The calm before a tornado, is short-lived, But yknow, it is was never calm before the sroem, there would be no such hing as the storm,,,right?
I do have a question about a phrse tho, that i wont take the time to ponder right now, somebody else figure it out…
Why do people say, usually in the midst of CALM before the DREADED storm…
I’m just waiting for the other SHOE TO DROP!
I know it means…somethings bound to ruin their happiness, but >>>SHOE TO DROP?…I can only think of someone being hung, and when the OTHER shoe drops, that mens you have the end or the whole storymaybe?,,morbid I know, but remember crazy artist typing here, …and sometimes I USE a lot of salt to get my point across..REALLy, tho…what and how was that phrased started. SPOOKY HALLOWEEN trivia… lol gotta go get my 40 WINKS (????)
i see a good question. when do you know you love someone. i think i am kinda got the bug myself again. who knows probably when you can’t stop thinking about her. hehe. oh and for the guys that are gonna probably give me a bunch of comments. your just jealous, you don’t do it. no i am not a sucker. i think some woman have had it hard and there ex’s prob never did nice stuff. everyonce in a while you should do something nice to show her you accually do appreciate it. and build her confidence up. it isn’t good when people are knockin you down 24/7. and not to mention. some woman haven’t seen romance in yrs. baby girl you may not want to hear it. but i do love ya. your ok even when you are mean. i understand. i am the same way.
))
actions speak louder than words. for every action there is a reaction. if you continue to do or go after the same type of people the end result will never change. why men like bitchy woman, it is a mystery.
by the way, a woman will go after a guy with nothing then complain they have nothing, or want better, when they are given the opportunity to get an easier life they think about it. how is it so complicating. there isn’t always a hidden agenda. than isn’t saying you have to be wealthy. some people have all there finances and priorities in order. so when they do find a good woman they can accually enjoy life.
hey i was at a bar last night, this girl and her dad were dancing. didn’t know it was her dad. they were doing pretty good. but the guy flipped. she must have left out of imbarressment. its all good. i think its good for a father to get along with his daughter like that. but if he is like that towards every guy that is nice to her she will never find a nice guy. only a jerk would want to be dealing with that drama. but its all cool. she has only been nice to me. shy girl too bad she is nice.
hmm the birds and the bee’s.polinating. seems only stupid people are polinating. haha, na just kidding, its the love bug bzzz. we all get it. stings at first but once you get over the innitial sting you got it licked.hhaha.becky i hope you like your gift and card.see i do care. and for the rest of you, i am feeling ok. don’t worry. the truth has come out. everything’s gonna be allright. life is short so enjoy it. heck still can’t believe how fast it went by.
great reference in The Prophet (which is a fantastic read) by Kahlil Gibran –
”And now you ask in your heart, “How shall we distinguish that which is good in pleasure from that which is not good?”
Go to your fields and your gardens, and you shall learn that it is the pleasure of the bee to gather honey of the flower,
But it is also the pleasure of the flower to yield its honey to the bee.
For to the bee a flower is a fountain of life,
And to the flower a bee is a messenger of love,
And to both, bee and flower, the giving and the receiving of pleasure is a need and an ecstasy.
People of Orphalese, be in your pleasures like the flowers and the bees. ”
and why a guy use it as the subject title of the email he send to the girl she’s dating..is he giving the idea about having sex? just sex?